Putting it in writing (Feelings)

I left El Paso, where I've lived the last 19 years of my life!! I moved to Laredo, TX with my family in 2010 and now I'm on the move again!!! This time I'm going to Southaven MS. Originally from Las Cruces, NM until I graduated in 1990.

I'm so excited yet I feel so guilty for feeling this way. I will miss my family and friends but really... I'm a private person and I don't mind being alone. I'm not very good at writing either and I know some family members feel unloved or even ignored but.... That's not it at all I just don't take the time to write them.

The house we are trying to buy is beautiful and I'm so excited, however we hit a snag with the bank! Looks like its going to take longer than anticipated. I'm believing God for this house! I know he wants what is best for my family! The other sad news is that my husband decided that we can't take my babies!!! (dogs) Honey and Bubba.

I'm not a dog person but these two have my heart! I really love them and I feel like they love me. One of my friends is going to keep both of them. This makes me happy because she Loves animals!!!!

This is the last week we will be here . We are getting ready for the packers to come on Wednesday.

On a personal level I'm feeling yucky, fat and undesirable !!! I know that deep in side my husband loves me but maybe not attracted to me! I've got to get back in shape!!! these 50lbs that I've picked up here in Laredo have got to go! I need to feel sexy wanted and hot! Still I Do need this for me, I know!!! I think him wanting me is for me! So my mind is set and I'm starting a new chapter in my life!!

I'm going to do a 4 day Master Cleanse

its is supposed to be 10 days but I'll do a trial before I'm permanently stable in my new home. In addition I'm going to start a 20 day exercise program where I'll start small and finish Big!! I think blogging my day to day feelings an tracking everything will hold me accountable at least for myself.

Nite, Nite hasta mañana !!